It’s February 1st.
Sadly, by now 80% of people have failed at their New Year’s Resolutions. Might this be you?
If so, chances are you’re discouraged and doing some destructive negative self-talk like … “I can’t do this. It’s too hard. You don’t understand…I’ve tried everything.”
I can help.
Here are three strategies (I call them “mental pushups”) you can implement right now to get yourself back on track:
Mental Push Up #1: You always have a choice.
Choice #1: You can choose to sit on the sidelines of life, feeling like a failure and comfort yourself with industrial-sized bags of Cheese Doodles all while speaking trash talk to yourself. I did this for decades. It’s a living hell. Please don’t cave to Choice #1. You deserve better.
Choice # 2: Every time you fail at your resolutions, get up and Begin Again.
When confident women mess up, they don’t allow themselves to get sucked into Cheese Doodle purgatory. Instead, they Begin Again.
You have the strength inside of you to do this too!
Here’s how:
Mental Push Up #2: Recognize that your resolutions have not disappeared. They are hanging out in the back of your mind, ready and willing for you to Begin Again. So don’t despair. Instead, choose #2 every day.
Mental Push Up #3: When you screw up, take 10 seconds to analyze what went wrong. Then commit to not repeating that same behavior when you Begin Again.
And pleeeease all you good ladies, don’t fall into a
self-flagellation gig saying “You see! I’m a failure. I can never hit my goals. I’m weak, too old, not strong enough….”. You must actively choose not to sink to these toxic, low levels of Doodle -Thinking.
Here are some mental toughness examples to help you develop your Begin Again habit. These may sound harsh but sometimes we need that little kick in the butt. I do!
Your diet doesn’t care that you said “no!” to chocolate mousse yesterday. Begin Again today.
Your calendar doesn’t care that you worked out yesterday. Begin Again today.
You set a boundary at work on Monday. Today no one remembers. It doesn’t mean you were ineffective. Don’t focus on that. Begin Again today.
Abstinent from Opioids yesterday? Good for you. Now remember: your drug dealer is waiting for you in the 12-Step Meeting parking lot. Don’t focus on him. Instead do your job: Begin Again today.
You next pickle ball shot doesn’t remember you aced your serve. Begin Again.
Do this every day, and girlfriend yer gonna smoke your goals. Your actions will start to have a cumulative effect:
- Weight is lost.
- That coworker begins to treat you differently.
- You are abstinent today. Fantastic!
- You win your pickleball match.
You feel confident, in charge of your emotions and are developing a powerful life long habit to maintain your resolutions.